Zobrazují se příspěvky se štítkemCostnerWishingForWaterWorld. Zobrazit všechny příspěvky
Zobrazují se příspěvky se štítkemCostnerWishingForWaterWorld. Zobrazit všechny příspěvky

27. dubna 2016

Criminal - a criminally bad movie [3/10 A.S.]

1. Criminal is one pretty awful movie. What else do you need to know? Originally the lead role was supposed to go to Nicolas Cage. Who turned it down. Do I really need to say more? How bad does a movie have to be for Cage to turn it down? Well bad enough to beat his last five awful movies, apparently. And it is.

2. The story goes something like this: an elite CIA operative who suffers fatal injury during his pursuit of an anarchistic terrorist who is -(wait for it) threatening the world peace - has his mind transferred into the brain of the world’s most dangerous and psychopathic criminal. Enter Kevin Costner, doing his best impression of Michal Richards on steroids. Why does the CIA need the memories of the agent in the psycho's brain? Because apparently that’s the only way to extract the mightily important information about the whereabouts of a sought-after hacker and a wormhole program that allows for bypassing "any and all" safeguards around the use of any nuclear weapons (wait for it again) in the world. Gee. Why aim so low? 

3. As the inconsistent and shallow "story" unravels, you may wonder: how come a talented director + talented cast doesn’t equal a good or at least enjoyable movie?  You may stuff your face with more popcorn or make out with the pretty girl next to you, but it still won't make the Criminal experience much better, I am afraid. Unless the girl next to you is really hot and willing to do some filthy stuff. In which case why waste the time you have together on watching Kevin Costner struggle as the uninterestingly portrayed and criminally insane Jericho Stewart? Beats me.